movement vs. exercise

I think about the time in my life when I was most "fit" or at least in my best physical shape. It seemed so easy back then!

During the winter of 2005 after dating a bunch of jerks and breaking my heart of one British boy (twice!) in particular. I started running. Whatchoosay!? That's right. I ran. Within six weeks (and this is shocking to me now) I went from no exercise to running a 5k in around thirty minutes, lifting weights and going to yoga at least weekly.

I felt great.

I looked even better!

In that time I lost over fifteen pounds and was the smallest I'd been in years * sidenote: certainly since I'd started nursing school. Letmetellya, there is NOTHING like nursing school to mess with your health! While in nursing school I started smoking (again!) I gained, like, twenty pounds, and never worked out ONCE. end sidenote* I felt like a million dollars, was sleeping like a baby and constantly had a spring in my step. All of this despite the fact that I was working a day/night rotation at the county hospital and was the single mama of a six year old boy!

Then. I fell in love.

Urgh.

The dinners out! The wine! The ice cream! And I replaced my runs with...uh...other activities. I have yet to believe that sex, even acrobatic sex, burns anywhere near as many calories as a good kettlebell workout. Hmmm. So. The pounds piled back on and here I sit, six years later, and unable to run a 5k in anything less than, say, 50 minutes.

Sigh.

What was most striking to me was that, when I actually got to the point that I could run a whole mile at a time I loved that feeling. It was like I could feel the endorphins kick in right at that mile, and oh how I loved that feeling. Glorious! Freeing!

So it's time to get back to that, to get back to finding movement that makes me feel glorious, makes me feel free. The saying is "no pain, no gain" and it's true that growth might be painful, but when you hit your stride.....the payback is incredible.